I Pray – a poem by studentasim

I pray…
I pray for confidence
I pray for strength
I pray to be strong
I pray to make a difference
I pray not to be afraid
I want quality in my life
I pray to defend myself
Oh God, please remove this film from my mind
That lurks in my life
This pressure in my mind
Making me feel useless
Each slight movement feeling impossible
Time plotting against me
Why do I have to fight myself always?
How much can I fight?
Yet, it is a miracle from God
That I am still alive
That I can even attempt to fight on
That I do fight on
That despite my fears, I am functional
I hope and I pray to survive
To struggle
To be okay
I have to like myself
And understand my condition
To improve myself
To try
Not to stop
But to search for that light
Always, God willing
And know there is dignity in this
To internalize and believe in struggle
That if I did
Looking back, it could have been a blessing
And if I didn’t, what could have become of me?
I pray…